Texting is a love-hate relationship for everyone that I know. While our generation has pioneered this revolution, we still seem to be baffled as to how to use it properly. Here’s a short and very incomplete list of the do’s and dont’s of texting (I’m not trying to be mean, these have all happened to me. Ok maybe they are a little exaggerated).
1. No complex questions
“Hey man did u do the homework for 2morrow? Can u explain to me how to do #3-18?? Oh ps I have no time to actually answer my phone so if u culd just txt me back that’d be gr8!”
2. No long stories
“(part 1 of 49) hey brant could you help me with my computer? There seems to be some kind of thick black smoke pouring out of the side of it. Is it bad if I dropped it in the…”
“(part 2 of 49) toilet a few days ago??? lol! Sorry for this ghetto long text! I just wanted to see if you could help me sometime like really soon because I am afraid these…”
“(part 3 of 49) flames might spread to the rest of my house!! ok thx ur like the best!! oh ps..sorry we haven’t talked in like 4 years! oh wait…i have this other story to tell!”
3. Don’t ask me out
“hey brant! it’s helga! So…ummm…ok this is kinda awkward! Remember me? I’m the one with the moustache…found your number off facebook! so just thinkin we culd go out sometime. What do you think??? I’ll let you pay!”
4. No secrets
“Brant don’t tell this to anyone but I think that your best friend is like the biggest jerk in the world and I don’t know why he’s going after my roommate. Plz don’t tell! Pinky swear!” (as my friend picks up my phone and says, “Hey man you got a text!”)
5. Don’t expect an immediate response
“URGENT!! ASAP!! OPEN ME!!! I can’t remember how to get to johnny’s house! i’ll just drive around til u text me back!!”
6. No relationship talk
“So…I’m too afraid to speak to you about our relationship…even though we’ve dated for a year now. I think we should get married, what do u think about it?”
7. Just because you’re bored doesn’t mean I am
“Hahaha..wish u were here! This guy in my class totally has a bald spot that looks like a Pokemon! Oh man..it’s great! Don’t worry, I’ll take a pic and send it 2 u!”
8. No texts after midnight
“Hey man I know you’re in bed and that you use your phone as an alarm clock but you are missing out on the crziest halo party of all time!!!!”
9. Don’t pretend to be personal with a mass text
“Hey you! Doin anythin fun 2night?? Let’s hang out sometime hot stuff!” (you know something’s wrong when you get one of these from you’re sister)
10. Don’t text me words to a song
“u better run, u better do what u can don’t wanna see no blood, don’t be a macho man u wanna be tough, better do what you can so beat it, but u wanna be bad…lol”
11. Respond
Just a bit of straightforward commentary here. When someone doesn’t respond to a text of mine it tells me one of two things: 1) The text wasn’t very important to them, 2) they are trying to avoid my contact. Sure, there’s an occasional time when we get overloaded, but don’t pull that excuse on me every time. It gets old. Real fast.
What rules do you have for texting? What drives you crazy?
